"A team called Bravos you say? Pro League division one? Well, that's very interesting excuse me," manager Tony Brazil is surprised to see a room full of journalists listening to his phone call from well-known agent Eco 'Econs' Econsson, "hi guys who let you all in?"

"Estadio Lucifer is in turmoil at the moment," sneers a hack, "we got in saying you'd signed us. That was good enough to get us right here, before that we've been into the players lounge for a good old drink and then watching the Spicks Killie match from the dugout. Some of us were lucky not be sent on as subs."

"I must admit," laughs Brazil, "It would be hard for me to put a face to some of the new signings coming in but we all know the mighty Graciano Quintas I'm sure. Won the Dream League cup with Ghost Dogs? Played in the XCL? Do your homework guys, next thing you'll be telling me you've never heard of our other big signing, Dirk Bhalsou, came from the Pro League and I'm saving his career."

"The rumors say you are team-hopping ship to the Pro League," whets another hack, "your phone call seems to confirm it as well. So what's going on?"

"We finished second last season. A great achievement but there was only one real title-rival and he won it. This season three of the best managers in Xpert Eleven are in the Xpert League, four if you count me."

This gets a laugh.

"I was going to rest on my laurels and seek fortune against less intimidating opposition but some big players became available on the market. I had a war chest to spend so thought why not give this league another go. Maybe the big fish will all eat each other leaving Matchstick Men as title winners!"

This gets the biggest laugh of the day.